i expect too much

This has got to stop. He continues to treat me like crap and for some reason I thought I was able to no longer let it get to me. Foolish. He still has the power to hurt me a lot. Way too much than he should ever be able to.

A very wise friend of mine just said that if I obsess over him, he wins. True.

I'm getting closer to the end. There's really nothing left anyway. If there was ever anything there to begin with. Maybe it was all in my head. It makes me sad to think that.

Mike says I am expecting too much of him now. I guess I always did. He always has dissapointed me. He promised he would call tonight and hasn't. I think he's with her again. Though he had promised dozens of times to stop that too. I do expect too much...not in general, but from him in particular; he has little to nothing to give. I know.

I texted this to a friend "i meant i expect too much from him precisely because he can't handle it. he can't handle much. no integrity. no honesty. no resolve. hollow."